It has been almost three months since my first Stem Cell procedure. Things I have noticed: My fissures are still there and occurring at the same rate, but they heal in weeks instead of months time. My itching is pretty much gone during the day and I only experience discomfort at night (perhaps because my body is hard at work trying to repair itself?), during the day I will have occasional stinging or burning, but the disease does not control my thoughts anymore.
I can sit on hard surfaces! Hurray!
Also, for the first time in eight years, I did not have a flair last month before my period!!!!!
I am so excited for the next procedure on November 14th. I know that I will have even more results after the second one.
Financial wise, we have enough for the second one, but are short by about $1250 or more for the last one sometime in February :( Not sure what we will do. Thoughts?
~S
Friday, October 11, 2013
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Falling Deeper & Deeper
I wish I had better news today. I was hoping that by this time (4 weeks out) I would have more positive things to report.
Lately, as each days passes, I fall deeper and deeper in a dark hole. I have days full of hope, productivity and find myself laughing, then I have days like today where I feel absolutely worthless as a human being.
I am still unemployed (I have an interview next week and am in the second process with another employer) therefor am not contributing financially or to society in any way. I am not a good wife as Matt has had to take care of the house on my bad days as well as the kids. I am not a good mother. I cannot bare to leave the house, let alone take the kids to a park or much of anything else. I am not a good friend and find myself pulling away more and more each day.
Perhaps I thought of this procedure as my last hope of a quality of life and now that it is not happening, I am in complete despair. I know that I need to give it time, but I am having pain that I have NEVER experienced with LS to this degree.
It hurts to sit, walk or even put on clothes. I have a constant burning and stabbing pain that is unbearable. I itch and am raw. The burning to this severity and length is new. New! Thus why I am feeling like I cannot be helped. Accepting that this is my life, there is no cure and this procedure (after all the work this last year to make it happen) may be a complete fail, makes me want to give up.
I still have the same fissures that I had the day of the procedure. Frustrating. I am supposed to call the doctor in one more day if I have not improved. And then what?!
I am usually a pretty positive, productive, suck it up and deal with it person. Most people who found out I was sick were shocked. I want to be that person again, but am finding a hard time finding her. I feel disconnected, alone and full of stress. Financially without my income, each week we fall deeper in debt. I am praying I get the job I am interviewing for next week as it is an online college course and working from home seems like a better option for me until I receive more treatments.
The last few weeks, I catch myself looking at "normal" women thinking, "She would be a great wife for my husband."
Living with constant pain is wearing physically, mentally and spiritually on me. I feel like I am too young to deal with this and with no cure in site, it is nothing less than devastating. I am beginning to feel like a burden to my husband.
My whole life all I have wanted is a career, busy life and to contribute. All of those things are crashing down and my disease is swallowing me up.
Pray that tomorrow I will find hope again. ~S
Lately, as each days passes, I fall deeper and deeper in a dark hole. I have days full of hope, productivity and find myself laughing, then I have days like today where I feel absolutely worthless as a human being.
I am still unemployed (I have an interview next week and am in the second process with another employer) therefor am not contributing financially or to society in any way. I am not a good wife as Matt has had to take care of the house on my bad days as well as the kids. I am not a good mother. I cannot bare to leave the house, let alone take the kids to a park or much of anything else. I am not a good friend and find myself pulling away more and more each day.
Perhaps I thought of this procedure as my last hope of a quality of life and now that it is not happening, I am in complete despair. I know that I need to give it time, but I am having pain that I have NEVER experienced with LS to this degree.
It hurts to sit, walk or even put on clothes. I have a constant burning and stabbing pain that is unbearable. I itch and am raw. The burning to this severity and length is new. New! Thus why I am feeling like I cannot be helped. Accepting that this is my life, there is no cure and this procedure (after all the work this last year to make it happen) may be a complete fail, makes me want to give up.
I still have the same fissures that I had the day of the procedure. Frustrating. I am supposed to call the doctor in one more day if I have not improved. And then what?!
I am usually a pretty positive, productive, suck it up and deal with it person. Most people who found out I was sick were shocked. I want to be that person again, but am finding a hard time finding her. I feel disconnected, alone and full of stress. Financially without my income, each week we fall deeper in debt. I am praying I get the job I am interviewing for next week as it is an online college course and working from home seems like a better option for me until I receive more treatments.
The last few weeks, I catch myself looking at "normal" women thinking, "She would be a great wife for my husband."
Living with constant pain is wearing physically, mentally and spiritually on me. I feel like I am too young to deal with this and with no cure in site, it is nothing less than devastating. I am beginning to feel like a burden to my husband.
My whole life all I have wanted is a career, busy life and to contribute. All of those things are crashing down and my disease is swallowing me up.
Pray that tomorrow I will find hope again. ~S
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Doubts & Fears
It has been 2 weeks since I had the Stem Cell/Plasma procedure.
I realize that Dr. Newman said it would take 6 weeks before I see the full results, but life is hard with LS during that time.
Each day is different. My swelling has decreased significantly and I am seeing a reduction in the scar tissue by at least 50% - great news. However, the itching, burning, stinging and not being able to walk without pain after certain activities is still there full force. Some days, I am near tears.
I am not fissure free, cannot sit on hard surfaces and am fighting the urge to crawl in bed.
Matt is home for another 5 days. I am booking my next procedure for November and it will literally drain my donation account.
Right now, I am focusing on finding a job. Matt is also seeking a second job. I have been unemployed from my job (the second one, the other one ended in June) now for exactly two days. I am expecting depression to set in momentarily as working got my mind off things and made us not in the category of "living paycheck to paycheck."
Today is not a good day. My disease is reminding me of its existence about every three seconds.
My hopes are that after the three procedures, I can go at least a day without pain.
I am also feeling lonely as I am a somewhat social person with work, volunteering and friends. Since my procedure, I have been house-bound which is not good :/ I find myself fighting off tears daily. I am trying to be positive, but sometimes it is just plain hard. ~S
I realize that Dr. Newman said it would take 6 weeks before I see the full results, but life is hard with LS during that time.
Each day is different. My swelling has decreased significantly and I am seeing a reduction in the scar tissue by at least 50% - great news. However, the itching, burning, stinging and not being able to walk without pain after certain activities is still there full force. Some days, I am near tears.
I am not fissure free, cannot sit on hard surfaces and am fighting the urge to crawl in bed.
Matt is home for another 5 days. I am booking my next procedure for November and it will literally drain my donation account.
Right now, I am focusing on finding a job. Matt is also seeking a second job. I have been unemployed from my job (the second one, the other one ended in June) now for exactly two days. I am expecting depression to set in momentarily as working got my mind off things and made us not in the category of "living paycheck to paycheck."
Today is not a good day. My disease is reminding me of its existence about every three seconds.
My hopes are that after the three procedures, I can go at least a day without pain.
I am also feeling lonely as I am a somewhat social person with work, volunteering and friends. Since my procedure, I have been house-bound which is not good :/ I find myself fighting off tears daily. I am trying to be positive, but sometimes it is just plain hard. ~S
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Fundraising Update
Update: I have enough in the bank to get me to the second procedure in L.A. in November. I am about $1250 short for the third and last one to be done sometime in February or March.
Feeling Good
Today is day 10 since I got the procedure done.
My stomach where the stem cells were harvested is faded to a yellow bruise. I am supposed to wear the compression garment for a few more weeks. The injection site is healing well and the swelling has subsided.
Last night it hurt to lay sideways as my thighs would compress the area and I had shooting pains. I need to ice more :/
I started using Dr. Newman's cream called Luminesce for the itching and it seems to work wonders.
I have my next appointment scheduled for November 14th. I have enough in the bank now for the entirety (travel, rental car, plasma) for that trip ;).
I am still looking for employment as my teaching job ends Friday. Say an extra prayer.
Matt is on FMLA to help around the house and with kids. They are keeping busy and having fun.
I cannot believe it is almost time for the kids to start school!
My stomach where the stem cells were harvested is faded to a yellow bruise. I am supposed to wear the compression garment for a few more weeks. The injection site is healing well and the swelling has subsided.
Last night it hurt to lay sideways as my thighs would compress the area and I had shooting pains. I need to ice more :/
I started using Dr. Newman's cream called Luminesce for the itching and it seems to work wonders.
I have my next appointment scheduled for November 14th. I have enough in the bank now for the entirety (travel, rental car, plasma) for that trip ;).
I am still looking for employment as my teaching job ends Friday. Say an extra prayer.
Matt is on FMLA to help around the house and with kids. They are keeping busy and having fun.
I cannot believe it is almost time for the kids to start school!
Thursday, July 25, 2013
Emotional Roller Coaster
The day of my last appointment (Wednesday) I was in complete despair. When I originally got the price quote from Dr. Newman (keep in mind he had not seen me yet) I was told 7k plus additional costs for PRP (plasma). I thought that meant that in the future, after the 3 treatments, it would be $750 to maintain. I was wrong.
I have already spent money on blood work ($500), air fare, rental car, skirts/yoga pants to wear after the surgery and the first initial treatment (7k). I have about $1400 left and have to once again pay for blood work (as the tests are only good according to law for 6 months) two more times of travel, rental car, hotel and plasma at $750 each time. Needless to say, we have fallen short-very short.
I was lying on the exam table in complete despair. I was just laid off from work, fundraising for the last 8 months was exhausting and took a toll, and without all three treatments, all of this has been for nothing. I could not help but cry. All my hopes were vanished in that one moment.
I could not help but look around at people in the streets, in cars and in restaurants and envy them for their normality. I could not believe that this is my life and my challenge.
The worst part, remission has been seen to last 9 months to 3 years at which point, this will all have to be done again. I need to get a job just to stay somewhat out of pain.
Today is day 4. I cannot walk without my compression garment as I have burning and a heavy weight with pain from where he harvested the stem cells. The area of the injections is swollen, itchy and in pain. I am trying to take it easy and stay hopeful. I am not seeing any results so far, but realize that could take six weeks.
My next appointment is scheduled for November 14th. Hopefully I will have enough money raised or get an awesome job offer before then to enable me to go. I have to keep remembering that I am paving the way to help Dr. Newman gather enough proof and research to get grants to hopefully one day enable my daughters to have a cure or at least their insurance pay for the treatment for this horrible disease. ~S
I have already spent money on blood work ($500), air fare, rental car, skirts/yoga pants to wear after the surgery and the first initial treatment (7k). I have about $1400 left and have to once again pay for blood work (as the tests are only good according to law for 6 months) two more times of travel, rental car, hotel and plasma at $750 each time. Needless to say, we have fallen short-very short.
I was lying on the exam table in complete despair. I was just laid off from work, fundraising for the last 8 months was exhausting and took a toll, and without all three treatments, all of this has been for nothing. I could not help but cry. All my hopes were vanished in that one moment.
I could not help but look around at people in the streets, in cars and in restaurants and envy them for their normality. I could not believe that this is my life and my challenge.
The worst part, remission has been seen to last 9 months to 3 years at which point, this will all have to be done again. I need to get a job just to stay somewhat out of pain.
Today is day 4. I cannot walk without my compression garment as I have burning and a heavy weight with pain from where he harvested the stem cells. The area of the injections is swollen, itchy and in pain. I am trying to take it easy and stay hopeful. I am not seeing any results so far, but realize that could take six weeks.
My next appointment is scheduled for November 14th. Hopefully I will have enough money raised or get an awesome job offer before then to enable me to go. I have to keep remembering that I am paving the way to help Dr. Newman gather enough proof and research to get grants to hopefully one day enable my daughters to have a cure or at least their insurance pay for the treatment for this horrible disease. ~S
 |
| Stomach after harvesting stem cells. Very painful and swollen. |
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| Inflammation treatment for the body. You just stick your hand in the machine. |
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
Stem Cell/Plasma Procedure
I flew to L.A. on Sunday with Matt. The flight was miserable. Virgin Air is horrible. It was hot in the plain and the seats are very cramped. It was hands down the worst flight EVER. I am not looking forward to the trip home with incisions and a swollen body. If we had more money I would upgrade to first class.
I wanted one day with my 3-year-old niece Isabella (I have never met her) before the procedure. We went and walked on the pier. I was miserable the whole time as walking always irritates me when I am in the middle of a flair and it is humid. I kept thinking that hopefully after the procedure I will be able to walk without being reminded of my disease. Later we had a wonderful evening with my cousin Destry (that I have not seen in years). Did I mention my SIL is an excellent cook? It was nice to sit outside, eat wonderful food and visit.
Monday was the procedure. My appointment was at 9 and even though it was less than 20 miles away, it took us 1.5 hours. Got to love L.A. traffic. First they gave me a pill that goes under my tongue to relax me (nothing that gets you sleepy, just calms the nerves), then they took my plasma, gave me a local shot and did the lipo to harvest the stem cells on my stomach (no, they do not take enough to make a difference-darn). The lipo was uncomfortable and hurt when he jammed the rod too far or grabbed my skin in his fingers. It was a horrible burning feeling. Trust me, I voiced my complaints. After, he took the plasma and stem cells and injected them into the affected area. Each one felt like a bee sting or worse. It was awful. I was there from 9-3 and grumpy when we left. It hurt to sit and I was very swollen. Because of the stem cells needing to be top notch to do their job, all you can take it an herbal anti-inflammatory and Tylenol.
Tuesday I was anxious to shower as I leaked blood, fat and fluids from both areas (lipo and where the stem cells were injected). I am bruised in both places and it hurts to stand. It actually reminds me of a c-section on some levels.
I go in tomorrow for an ultrasound appointment and then fly back. I am supposed to go back every three months for two or three more procedures. So what does the procedure do?
After examining me, he told me I have fusing (meaning parts of my body are no longer there or losing their structure, layers of built up scar tissue and discolored skin). He said I was a tough cookie for lasting this long and it made me feel good that someone actually had compassion and understood on some sort of level.
Our hopes are that after the 3 procedures I will go into remission. Meaning that the fissures, fusing, white patches, loss of sensation, constant pain, itching, tingling and stinging will be reduced by 80%. The drawback, when it comes back and I am out of remission (this could be anywhere from 1-3 years) I will have to repeat the procedure and cost. Ugh.
It is his hope that he will gather enough information, research and proof to get grants so that women like me can be treated and not suffer or eat the whole cost. Pray this happens fast. I cannot afford 10k per year.
I am hoping, praying and wishing for a long remission. ~S
I wanted one day with my 3-year-old niece Isabella (I have never met her) before the procedure. We went and walked on the pier. I was miserable the whole time as walking always irritates me when I am in the middle of a flair and it is humid. I kept thinking that hopefully after the procedure I will be able to walk without being reminded of my disease. Later we had a wonderful evening with my cousin Destry (that I have not seen in years). Did I mention my SIL is an excellent cook? It was nice to sit outside, eat wonderful food and visit.
Monday was the procedure. My appointment was at 9 and even though it was less than 20 miles away, it took us 1.5 hours. Got to love L.A. traffic. First they gave me a pill that goes under my tongue to relax me (nothing that gets you sleepy, just calms the nerves), then they took my plasma, gave me a local shot and did the lipo to harvest the stem cells on my stomach (no, they do not take enough to make a difference-darn). The lipo was uncomfortable and hurt when he jammed the rod too far or grabbed my skin in his fingers. It was a horrible burning feeling. Trust me, I voiced my complaints. After, he took the plasma and stem cells and injected them into the affected area. Each one felt like a bee sting or worse. It was awful. I was there from 9-3 and grumpy when we left. It hurt to sit and I was very swollen. Because of the stem cells needing to be top notch to do their job, all you can take it an herbal anti-inflammatory and Tylenol.
Tuesday I was anxious to shower as I leaked blood, fat and fluids from both areas (lipo and where the stem cells were injected). I am bruised in both places and it hurts to stand. It actually reminds me of a c-section on some levels.
I go in tomorrow for an ultrasound appointment and then fly back. I am supposed to go back every three months for two or three more procedures. So what does the procedure do?
After examining me, he told me I have fusing (meaning parts of my body are no longer there or losing their structure, layers of built up scar tissue and discolored skin). He said I was a tough cookie for lasting this long and it made me feel good that someone actually had compassion and understood on some sort of level.
Our hopes are that after the 3 procedures I will go into remission. Meaning that the fissures, fusing, white patches, loss of sensation, constant pain, itching, tingling and stinging will be reduced by 80%. The drawback, when it comes back and I am out of remission (this could be anywhere from 1-3 years) I will have to repeat the procedure and cost. Ugh.
It is his hope that he will gather enough information, research and proof to get grants so that women like me can be treated and not suffer or eat the whole cost. Pray this happens fast. I cannot afford 10k per year.
I am hoping, praying and wishing for a long remission. ~S
Sunday, May 26, 2013
We Reached Our Goal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WE HIT OUR GOAL OF 10K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you, thank you to all of those that prayed, donated time, effort, auction items & money to Hope for Healing. In 56 short days, I will be getting the Stem Cell/Plasma treatment in L.A. thanks to ALL OF YOU. Much Love & Thanks. ~S
“The human contribution is the essential ingredient. It is only in the giving of oneself to others that we truly live.” ~Ethyl Percy Andrus
Thank you, thank you to all of those that prayed, donated time, effort, auction items & money to Hope for Healing. In 56 short days, I will be getting the Stem Cell/Plasma treatment in L.A. thanks to ALL OF YOU. Much Love & Thanks. ~S
“The human contribution is the essential ingredient. It is only in the giving of oneself to others that we truly live.” ~Ethyl Percy Andrus
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Our Last Fundraiser!!!!
Go to this link to bid on 19 fabulous items! 100% goes to my procedure! ~S
www.32auctions.com/Hopeforhealing
www.32auctions.com/Hopeforhealing
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Things to Smile about...
As I sit in my living room grading by a big beautiful window with a view of the sunshine, I reflect on a few things that are making me smile right now...
1} My husband. Even after 14 years, he still makes my heart race.
2} Miss Maddie turns 8 today!
3} I have lost 46 lbs since Feb. 25th. Woo Hoo!!
4} I get to eat a piece of cake tonight. LOL.
5} I LOVE sunshine.
6} Both my kids get baptized this Saturday!!!
7} All my friends in my life.
8} We have raised just over 9k for my procedure!!!!!
9} I LOVE to exercise.
10} I am grateful for family.
~S
1} My husband. Even after 14 years, he still makes my heart race.
2} Miss Maddie turns 8 today!
3} I have lost 46 lbs since Feb. 25th. Woo Hoo!!
4} I get to eat a piece of cake tonight. LOL.
5} I LOVE sunshine.
6} Both my kids get baptized this Saturday!!!
7} All my friends in my life.
8} We have raised just over 9k for my procedure!!!!!
9} I LOVE to exercise.
10} I am grateful for family.
~S
Friday, April 19, 2013
And Life Goes On...
Yesterday I took Maddie to her 3rd doctor. I was really hoping that they would tell me anything but, "It's LS." I would have even taken, "She has a growth in her intestines and needs surgery." At least that is fixable, temporary and she would be out of pain." I was also not very happy to hear the doctor's suggestions. "Give her a stool softener each day." She also told me she would refer me back to dermatology. The problem, dermatology referred me to the GI department (they did not want to biopsy or treat her fissures). The next step, to see if Doernbecher has someone that can treat her.
It seems that no one understands or can help me know what to say, comfort and heal my little girl. On most days, due to the four fissures she currently has (2 going clear up the rectum), she screams out in pain and cries when she has a bowel movement. We have tried various things to ease her pain and many prescription creams. Like me, she just is not responding. So frustrating.
Before the appointment yesterday, we went to lunch together at The Laughing Planet Cafe. We had to park a few blocks away and she was complaining of the stinging, burning and itching of the fissures as she walked. It is heartbreaking to see your little girl not be able to walk down the street at age 7 without pain and the reminder of her disease. This is reality for me and has been for a long time.
I encouraged her to keep walking and told her I knew she was uncomfortable as mom was too. After the doctor appointment she asked me if she did in fact have what I have. I told her yes and her only comment was, "You mean I will never get better?" I explained to her she would have waxing and waning of symptoms, but yes, this was how it was now. She was quiet the rest of the ride home from Portland.
As a newborn, I held her little body close and cried when I found out she had a stroke at birth. For the first year, I worked with her daily to strengthen the side that was weak and filled her days with stimulus. Each year after, I never made her aware of her stroke and pushed her daily. We celebrated her getting off her IEP an speech a few months ago and things were looking up. Now, with this new trial she has to deal with, I feel helpless. Have we not been through enough?
I cannot believe that 2/2 of my daughters has my disease. Yesterday, I did not cry or breakdown, but rather was very angry. I am going to have to dig deep and find the strength to deal with my disease and both my daughters. I have to teach them that you don't use your disease as an excuse, you don't let it define you and you push on. So hard to do 24/7 especially when you are in pain.
I had a mental breakdown in regards to dealing with my own pain last weekend. I felt so overwhelmed with my own health and now I have to deal with two more. So daunting.
Yesterday, I did not have time to reflect, but rather had to jump right into our day. After the doctor appointment, I came home to some beautiful roses my mom and dad had shipped to me. I really needed to feel loved and supported and that was just what I needed. I had to get Maddie ready for her ballet pictures and finish grading. She was so beautiful in her costume that it took my breath away. After, I went door-to-door to hand out fliers for one of my 3 upcoming fundraisers. I was even more motivated to raise money. If this stem cell therapy takes even 50% of my pain away, then there is hope for my girls.
I couldn't help but look at her and see flashes of her future before me. I was saddened by what she would have to endure. My heart breaks for my two little girls.
Ashlin's LS has manifested itself in itching and very small, very random splits (similar to how mine started as a little girl). Hers is much more manageable at this point. Maddie's has manifested itself in horrible fissures that make me cringe when I see them. Hers is very aggressive and if they don't get it somewhat under control, scar tissue, fusing and damage will occur to her female parts.
It is so hard being a mom. I pray I have the strength to be what they need and fight for them.
I don't want my girls to feel ashamed, attach their illness to their self-image and miss out on life because of it. Maddie crawled in bed after her ballet pictures and looked so sad. I asked her if she wanted a sleepover Friday night and her response was, "No, my bum hurts too bad. I just want to lay in bed." How do you teach your child pain coping skills that have taken you years to learn without being harsh or making them feel like you do not care? I told her okay and that maybe she might change her mind in the morning :(
I feel like the walls around me are crumbling and I have no way to get out. ~S
It seems that no one understands or can help me know what to say, comfort and heal my little girl. On most days, due to the four fissures she currently has (2 going clear up the rectum), she screams out in pain and cries when she has a bowel movement. We have tried various things to ease her pain and many prescription creams. Like me, she just is not responding. So frustrating.
Before the appointment yesterday, we went to lunch together at The Laughing Planet Cafe. We had to park a few blocks away and she was complaining of the stinging, burning and itching of the fissures as she walked. It is heartbreaking to see your little girl not be able to walk down the street at age 7 without pain and the reminder of her disease. This is reality for me and has been for a long time.
I encouraged her to keep walking and told her I knew she was uncomfortable as mom was too. After the doctor appointment she asked me if she did in fact have what I have. I told her yes and her only comment was, "You mean I will never get better?" I explained to her she would have waxing and waning of symptoms, but yes, this was how it was now. She was quiet the rest of the ride home from Portland.
As a newborn, I held her little body close and cried when I found out she had a stroke at birth. For the first year, I worked with her daily to strengthen the side that was weak and filled her days with stimulus. Each year after, I never made her aware of her stroke and pushed her daily. We celebrated her getting off her IEP an speech a few months ago and things were looking up. Now, with this new trial she has to deal with, I feel helpless. Have we not been through enough?
I cannot believe that 2/2 of my daughters has my disease. Yesterday, I did not cry or breakdown, but rather was very angry. I am going to have to dig deep and find the strength to deal with my disease and both my daughters. I have to teach them that you don't use your disease as an excuse, you don't let it define you and you push on. So hard to do 24/7 especially when you are in pain.
I had a mental breakdown in regards to dealing with my own pain last weekend. I felt so overwhelmed with my own health and now I have to deal with two more. So daunting.
Yesterday, I did not have time to reflect, but rather had to jump right into our day. After the doctor appointment, I came home to some beautiful roses my mom and dad had shipped to me. I really needed to feel loved and supported and that was just what I needed. I had to get Maddie ready for her ballet pictures and finish grading. She was so beautiful in her costume that it took my breath away. After, I went door-to-door to hand out fliers for one of my 3 upcoming fundraisers. I was even more motivated to raise money. If this stem cell therapy takes even 50% of my pain away, then there is hope for my girls.
I couldn't help but look at her and see flashes of her future before me. I was saddened by what she would have to endure. My heart breaks for my two little girls.
Ashlin's LS has manifested itself in itching and very small, very random splits (similar to how mine started as a little girl). Hers is much more manageable at this point. Maddie's has manifested itself in horrible fissures that make me cringe when I see them. Hers is very aggressive and if they don't get it somewhat under control, scar tissue, fusing and damage will occur to her female parts.
It is so hard being a mom. I pray I have the strength to be what they need and fight for them.
I don't want my girls to feel ashamed, attach their illness to their self-image and miss out on life because of it. Maddie crawled in bed after her ballet pictures and looked so sad. I asked her if she wanted a sleepover Friday night and her response was, "No, my bum hurts too bad. I just want to lay in bed." How do you teach your child pain coping skills that have taken you years to learn without being harsh or making them feel like you do not care? I told her okay and that maybe she might change her mind in the morning :(
I feel like the walls around me are crumbling and I have no way to get out. ~S
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Fig & Olive
We got a new kitten last Friday. We had our choice of two different ones-brothers. I chose the one that was really cuddly, had something wrong with its leg (a double-joint) and looked liked it really needed some love. What can I say...I am a sucker for fragile things.
Matt & I surprised the kids that day with their new 8 week old kitten. We have one cat, age 1.5 years and thought it would be a good idea to get a playmate for her. The kids were so elated with joy. We spent all night cuddling and showering love on our new kitten.
However, the kitten was really lethargic and would not drink or eat a thing. I got worried and made an appointment at our vet for Saturday morning. We went in and they took him away for x-rays because his belly seemed really swollen. While in the waiting room, the girls picked out the name "Fig Newton," Fig for short.
The vet came in and informed us that our kitten was dying and would need to be put to sleep that day! Apparently it had a ruptured bladder and was too weak to endure any type of surgery being that young and fragile. I cried. It brought back memories of when I had to put my cat down as a teenager.
I was so sad for my kids. We took Fig home to say goodbye and so that we could let my son say goodbye as well. As I came in the door, with the kitten wrapped in a blanket in my arms, and walked upstairs, it passed away. I was so sad and could not quit crying. Such a sweet, tender, young little thing that died so young.
My kids kept asking when we could get another one, so I did some research and found a place that adopts only healthy kittens. They are called CAT. They do all the tests, shots, spay/neuter and put a microchip in before you pick it up. We went today (to the foster parent's house) to choose from 3 kittens (1 boy and 2 girls).
My kids (mainly Jaiden) loved the boy, but I had a feeling we would have to name him "trouble." He is a cutie, but super rambunctious and a little crazy. Hehe. We decided on a female that is super sweet. She is only 6 weeks old, so we get to pick her up in two weeks once she gets surgery (fixed). We are so excited to welcome our second (and last pet) kitten to our home.
Meet "Olive."
Matt & I surprised the kids that day with their new 8 week old kitten. We have one cat, age 1.5 years and thought it would be a good idea to get a playmate for her. The kids were so elated with joy. We spent all night cuddling and showering love on our new kitten.
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| Look at that face! So stinkin cute. |
However, the kitten was really lethargic and would not drink or eat a thing. I got worried and made an appointment at our vet for Saturday morning. We went in and they took him away for x-rays because his belly seemed really swollen. While in the waiting room, the girls picked out the name "Fig Newton," Fig for short.
The vet came in and informed us that our kitten was dying and would need to be put to sleep that day! Apparently it had a ruptured bladder and was too weak to endure any type of surgery being that young and fragile. I cried. It brought back memories of when I had to put my cat down as a teenager.
I was so sad for my kids. We took Fig home to say goodbye and so that we could let my son say goodbye as well. As I came in the door, with the kitten wrapped in a blanket in my arms, and walked upstairs, it passed away. I was so sad and could not quit crying. Such a sweet, tender, young little thing that died so young.
My kids kept asking when we could get another one, so I did some research and found a place that adopts only healthy kittens. They are called CAT. They do all the tests, shots, spay/neuter and put a microchip in before you pick it up. We went today (to the foster parent's house) to choose from 3 kittens (1 boy and 2 girls).
My kids (mainly Jaiden) loved the boy, but I had a feeling we would have to name him "trouble." He is a cutie, but super rambunctious and a little crazy. Hehe. We decided on a female that is super sweet. She is only 6 weeks old, so we get to pick her up in two weeks once she gets surgery (fixed). We are so excited to welcome our second (and last pet) kitten to our home.
Meet "Olive."
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
11k Views Giveaway!!!!!
I decided to do a fun giveaway once this blog hits 11,000 page views.
The rules are simple:
1. Leave me a comment to this post describing how FAITH influences your life in helping you cope with pain, stress or life in general. It can be faith in a higher power, faith in your own abilities, faith in friends and family or anything else.
2. Check back for my response to your post and once we hit 11k views, I will announce the winner!
So what is the prize you might ask?
Since I LOVE Pottery Barn, I will send the winner a little something via mail from them.
I am approaching my Stem Cell Procedure in a few months and I need some inspiration. Tell me your story here.
"Faith allows things to happen. It is the power that comes from
a fearless heart. And when a fearless heart believes, miracles
happen." -Author Unknown
a fearless heart. And when a fearless heart believes, miracles
happen." -Author Unknown
~S
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Addicted
As you know, I changed the way my family eats a few months ago and we are in full swing.
Almost a month ago I decided to start exercising again.
I have become obsessed. Like seriously obsessed. It is strange. I have never been this way about exercise since I was a teen.
I do the treadmill a minimum of 42 minutes a day, 7 days a week. Every other day, I do a 35 minute stability ball routine as well. A few days ago, on the days I don't do the stability ball, I added weight lifting.
You know what is weird? I look forward to it. Plan my day around it.
All this exercise has not really irritated my LS, but rather made me cope with the sweating and itching better. I have moisture wicking pants and make sure it is as cold as I can get it in the house. I still have two fissures on the perineum that are constantly battling me, but I refuse to give up.
My kids have even started working out with me too. My favorite part...on the days the kids are in school, Ash and I go on nature trails instead of doing the treadmill. This makes for a way better workout since I am forced to keep up with her on her bike! Love it! I can't wait for summer so I can enjoy nicer weather.
I made a promise that after all the hard work raising money and all the people that are paying for me to get the Stem Cell/Plasma procedure...I would get my body in the best shape possible (in 5 months) in order for my body to be able to respond and heal better.
Did I mention that all this healthy eating and working out is giving me energy that is non-stop? I made a joke the other day that I feel like I am on crack! Haha. My house has never been cleaner. LOL. Before, I had body aches and seriously felt like I was 90 some days. Now, I feel like my age!
I am getting stronger and I love that feeling. Being in control of your body and treating it like a machine is so much better than just filling it with junk.
I owe a lot of my success to a bunch of lovely ladies (in my church) that keep me motivated via a FB page called E3. We report weekly our progress and keep each other motivated. Thanks Ladies!!!!!
~S
Almost a month ago I decided to start exercising again.
I have become obsessed. Like seriously obsessed. It is strange. I have never been this way about exercise since I was a teen.
I do the treadmill a minimum of 42 minutes a day, 7 days a week. Every other day, I do a 35 minute stability ball routine as well. A few days ago, on the days I don't do the stability ball, I added weight lifting.
You know what is weird? I look forward to it. Plan my day around it.
All this exercise has not really irritated my LS, but rather made me cope with the sweating and itching better. I have moisture wicking pants and make sure it is as cold as I can get it in the house. I still have two fissures on the perineum that are constantly battling me, but I refuse to give up.
My kids have even started working out with me too. My favorite part...on the days the kids are in school, Ash and I go on nature trails instead of doing the treadmill. This makes for a way better workout since I am forced to keep up with her on her bike! Love it! I can't wait for summer so I can enjoy nicer weather.
I made a promise that after all the hard work raising money and all the people that are paying for me to get the Stem Cell/Plasma procedure...I would get my body in the best shape possible (in 5 months) in order for my body to be able to respond and heal better.
Did I mention that all this healthy eating and working out is giving me energy that is non-stop? I made a joke the other day that I feel like I am on crack! Haha. My house has never been cleaner. LOL. Before, I had body aches and seriously felt like I was 90 some days. Now, I feel like my age!
I am getting stronger and I love that feeling. Being in control of your body and treating it like a machine is so much better than just filling it with junk.
I owe a lot of my success to a bunch of lovely ladies (in my church) that keep me motivated via a FB page called E3. We report weekly our progress and keep each other motivated. Thanks Ladies!!!!!
~S
Sunday, March 17, 2013
It's Been a While
Wow. I have not blogged for a while. Life I guess. So here's an update...
Food/Paleo: We are doing great on our eating plan. It has been hard for Jaiden to give up some carbs, but he is getting used to it. We have one cheat meal a week-nothing too crazy. This week it will be Pho. My kids love that soup as do I.
St. Patrick's Day/Easter: The naughty little leprechauns visited our house last night. The girls were so excited when they woke up. It was pretty entertaining. We had chalk shamrocks on the walls, tp on my candlesticks, green toilet water, window clings on places other than windows (covering up faces on picture frames), gold chocolate coins hidden all downstairs, green jelly beans and fruit placed on furniture. We have never done anything for this holiday in the past, but Maddie's school does, so she is pretty into it. LOL.
We sent out Easter invites for our Egg Hunt/Lunch and decorated the house today. I love Easter. My little brother and future wife are coming this year as well. We are excited to see their new 9 week old puppy.
Me: Nothing too exciting to report. Still working, been working out six days a week, eating super healthy and am dealing with an infected Bartholin gland for weeks now. Hoping I don't have to have surgery on it. Ugh.
Fundraising: Our next fundraiser will be at Gold Hill Nursery in Hillsboro on April 27th. They are not normally open to the public and will be having some awesome deals. We did our whole front yard for $60 last year. We are also in the process of putting together a silent auction for May. We have collected golf packages to Bend and other great things. I am hoping both will be successful and we will be done!
Kids: The kids are getting excited for summer, as am I. Maddie and Jaiden get baptized May 4th. We have been going to church regularly which is nice. Maddie turns 8 in April and Jaiden 12 in June. My kids are getting old!!! Jaiden will be going to scout camp for a week as well. Maddie is getting ready for her big ballet performance the end of spring. Ash is Ash. She spends days with me and is now having two play dates a week without her siblings. She is so attached to Maddie that I made it a point to get her alone with some of her friends. I am enjoying her last year before she starts Kindergarten.
I feel like this is one of those Christmas letters people send out. LOL. ~S
Food/Paleo: We are doing great on our eating plan. It has been hard for Jaiden to give up some carbs, but he is getting used to it. We have one cheat meal a week-nothing too crazy. This week it will be Pho. My kids love that soup as do I.
St. Patrick's Day/Easter: The naughty little leprechauns visited our house last night. The girls were so excited when they woke up. It was pretty entertaining. We had chalk shamrocks on the walls, tp on my candlesticks, green toilet water, window clings on places other than windows (covering up faces on picture frames), gold chocolate coins hidden all downstairs, green jelly beans and fruit placed on furniture. We have never done anything for this holiday in the past, but Maddie's school does, so she is pretty into it. LOL.
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| The Leprechauns did crazy things to the kids' Easter drawings. |
We sent out Easter invites for our Egg Hunt/Lunch and decorated the house today. I love Easter. My little brother and future wife are coming this year as well. We are excited to see their new 9 week old puppy.
Me: Nothing too exciting to report. Still working, been working out six days a week, eating super healthy and am dealing with an infected Bartholin gland for weeks now. Hoping I don't have to have surgery on it. Ugh.
Fundraising: Our next fundraiser will be at Gold Hill Nursery in Hillsboro on April 27th. They are not normally open to the public and will be having some awesome deals. We did our whole front yard for $60 last year. We are also in the process of putting together a silent auction for May. We have collected golf packages to Bend and other great things. I am hoping both will be successful and we will be done!
Kids: The kids are getting excited for summer, as am I. Maddie and Jaiden get baptized May 4th. We have been going to church regularly which is nice. Maddie turns 8 in April and Jaiden 12 in June. My kids are getting old!!! Jaiden will be going to scout camp for a week as well. Maddie is getting ready for her big ballet performance the end of spring. Ash is Ash. She spends days with me and is now having two play dates a week without her siblings. She is so attached to Maddie that I made it a point to get her alone with some of her friends. I am enjoying her last year before she starts Kindergarten.
I feel like this is one of those Christmas letters people send out. LOL. ~S
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Things They Say & Wish
The other day I was driving and listening to Ashlin ask me a million questions about various things as she always does. Mainly her questions involve astronomy.
She has told us her desire of wanting to be a baby again. Why, I don't know. She often will ask me to push her in her red stroller (that we still have on a shelf in the garage), has mentioned buying diapers for her and even wanted her old crib back OR for us to buy her a new one.
I am not sure where this fascination comes from or the need to stay little. Perhaps because she is my baby. Next year she will be in Kindergarten and 6-years-old. Hard to believe.
She gets really excited when she sees "The First Star" in the sky and will squeeze her little eyes tight and make a wish. I have always wondered what she might be wishing for.
She had asked me if I take her to the doctor if they inject her with poison, if she would turn into a baby again (I have no idea where she got this idea from). She seemed disappointed when I informed her that was just not possible.
She proceeded to ask me if she wished upon the first star to be a baby, would it not come true then?
I looked at the disappointment in her face and my heart swelled for her. How I wish I could make all of her dreams come true, but we all have to grow up. In so many ways she wants to be big like her sister, but in more ways she wants to be little.
Life goes by too fast. Next year all 3 of my kids will be in school and my son will be in Middle School.
Hard to believe. ;) ~S
She has told us her desire of wanting to be a baby again. Why, I don't know. She often will ask me to push her in her red stroller (that we still have on a shelf in the garage), has mentioned buying diapers for her and even wanted her old crib back OR for us to buy her a new one.
I am not sure where this fascination comes from or the need to stay little. Perhaps because she is my baby. Next year she will be in Kindergarten and 6-years-old. Hard to believe.
She gets really excited when she sees "The First Star" in the sky and will squeeze her little eyes tight and make a wish. I have always wondered what she might be wishing for.
She had asked me if I take her to the doctor if they inject her with poison, if she would turn into a baby again (I have no idea where she got this idea from). She seemed disappointed when I informed her that was just not possible.
She proceeded to ask me if she wished upon the first star to be a baby, would it not come true then?
I looked at the disappointment in her face and my heart swelled for her. How I wish I could make all of her dreams come true, but we all have to grow up. In so many ways she wants to be big like her sister, but in more ways she wants to be little.
Life goes by too fast. Next year all 3 of my kids will be in school and my son will be in Middle School.
Hard to believe. ;) ~S
Thursday, February 14, 2013
First Goal Accomplished & Lessons Learned
First Goal:
Guess what?! In 3 short months we have hit our first fundraising goal! Congrats to Bryan Utley for winning the gun raffle!
Thanks to my amazing husband who worked so hard to distribute tickets. For the Gun Raffle alone we profited $2,150!!!!! For a total amount raised of $7,850.
I am now able to schedule and pay completely for the Stem Cell Procedure and medications!
Wow. So blessed.
Now we need to hit our travel expenses goal. Not sure how much this will be, but I am estimating at least 2k. We have plenty of time to do it, some great fundraisers coming up and I am confident it will happen. At least we don't need all of the travel expenses up front like the procedure. Since I go 3x, all I need before August is the first travel expense (airline tickets and so forth) which we already have!
I decided to go with August for the first procedure because June and July are busy with birthdays, an anniversary and other important events. I needed to do it when school is out so child care for all three kids would be easier. August is pretty laid back around here ;)
Lessons Learned:
"Faith allows things to happen. It is the power that comes from a fearless heart. And when a fearless heart believes, miracles happen."
I LOVE this quote. I had a ton of fear when I first decided to do fundraisers to help me get the treatment I need. I would have to reveal my disease, ask for help and face the fear of rejection. I had to face that fear and have faith that I would be taken care of.
I have learned through this process (especially since we can see who has donated) that I am very, very blessed. Complete strangers, organizations, businesses, friends and family have all come together in my behalf. People who had little or no money to give, gave anyway. People went without Christmas gifts for ME.
I have a full heart at the love that has been shown and all the support. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for all these people and the community. It is such an indescribable feeling to know that when you are in need, humanity is not lost--people come together.
There are some people I thought would donate, even a small amount, who have not. However, I will not focus on who did not, but rather who did and continue to do so. I am indeed a loved person and I have so many holding me up at this time.
I have always had an innate sense of compassion and charity ever since I was little and am so blessed to have met so many people that do as well. I am reminded of this quote:
"But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him? Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth." -1 John 3:17-18
Through this process, I have really found out who my true friends are and met many more along the way ;)
How blessed am I to have so many people with open hearts. Happy Valentines Day. xoxo ~S
Saturday, February 2, 2013
Confusion
I FINALLY went to the Vulvar Pain Clinic in Portland last week for a check-up.
My doctor (an Obgyn) put me on three different over-the-counter creams AND another cream with nasty side effects.
Then, I went to a dermatologist for a mole removal today. I have been asking for a referral to a dermatologist (for LS) for years, so it was nice to finally go in.
While I was there, I asked her to check my LS as this is a skin disease.
She told me to NOT use ANY of the meds the other doctor gave me and wrote a prescription for another med. Interesting and confusing.
I am going to start seeing her as she is a doctor that specializes in skin issues and compared to the other millions of doctors I have seen, her bedside manner rocks!
She also informed me that my skin is "fusing." Mainly, the labia minora is fusing with labia mijora. Not good news. This is causing stretched skin and splitting.
Sad that I am progressing to that stage. In the LS community, this is referred to as the parts "melting together."
I am trying to keep my head up and stay positive.
My doctor (an Obgyn) put me on three different over-the-counter creams AND another cream with nasty side effects.
Then, I went to a dermatologist for a mole removal today. I have been asking for a referral to a dermatologist (for LS) for years, so it was nice to finally go in.
While I was there, I asked her to check my LS as this is a skin disease.
She told me to NOT use ANY of the meds the other doctor gave me and wrote a prescription for another med. Interesting and confusing.
I am going to start seeing her as she is a doctor that specializes in skin issues and compared to the other millions of doctors I have seen, her bedside manner rocks!
She also informed me that my skin is "fusing." Mainly, the labia minora is fusing with labia mijora. Not good news. This is causing stretched skin and splitting.
Sad that I am progressing to that stage. In the LS community, this is referred to as the parts "melting together."
I am trying to keep my head up and stay positive.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
On the Road to Paleo
Our family has decided to go Paleo.
Why?
Our family has a handful of health issues (food allergies, chronic heartburn, diabetes) and I am confident that this new way of eating will enable us to be more healthy as a family.
Starting tomorrow, I am going to replace one meal (dinner) with Paleo. The next Monday, we will replace lunch and the following week breakfast. I figured dinner would be the easiest as it gives me more meal planning time. With three kids, breakfast is rushed due to getting them out the door to school and lunch is packed which is going to take some serious meal planning to accomplish.
Why not cold turkey? I think my kids will adjust better if we ease them off slow.
We are also going to start weight lifting and walking as a family. Maddie cannot even open a single serving of fish crackers or brush her hair without whining that her arms are burning. Poor girl is a stick and needs some serious muscle.
This is not going to be a temporary diet, but rather a new lifestyle. I think it will be the hardest on the kids.
Will they occasionally get to cheat? Yes. With birthday parties, sleepovers and other events, that would be impossible to make them stick to the Paleo lifestyle and I don't want to make this new eating plan a negative thing or punishment.
I have been watching and reading on what processed food is doing to our bodies and I want to teach my kids to eat healthier and limit sugar and processed foods that are detrimental to our health.
I have a friend who has been Paleo for a few years now and has pointed me to some great blogs and websites with recipes and advice.
So what can and can't we eat?
CAN:
Considering that Maddie is allergic to wheat and dairy, I think we will do well. I will randomly keep you updated on our progress. ~S
Websites to check out if curious:
http://thepaleodiet.com/about-the-paleo-diet/
http://www.marksdailyapple.com/#axzz2JDYhhCxX
http://paleomg.com/
http://everydaypaleo.com/
http://paleopot.com/
http://www.chowstalker.com/
Why?
Our family has a handful of health issues (food allergies, chronic heartburn, diabetes) and I am confident that this new way of eating will enable us to be more healthy as a family.
Starting tomorrow, I am going to replace one meal (dinner) with Paleo. The next Monday, we will replace lunch and the following week breakfast. I figured dinner would be the easiest as it gives me more meal planning time. With three kids, breakfast is rushed due to getting them out the door to school and lunch is packed which is going to take some serious meal planning to accomplish.
Why not cold turkey? I think my kids will adjust better if we ease them off slow.
We are also going to start weight lifting and walking as a family. Maddie cannot even open a single serving of fish crackers or brush her hair without whining that her arms are burning. Poor girl is a stick and needs some serious muscle.
This is not going to be a temporary diet, but rather a new lifestyle. I think it will be the hardest on the kids.
Will they occasionally get to cheat? Yes. With birthday parties, sleepovers and other events, that would be impossible to make them stick to the Paleo lifestyle and I don't want to make this new eating plan a negative thing or punishment.
I have been watching and reading on what processed food is doing to our bodies and I want to teach my kids to eat healthier and limit sugar and processed foods that are detrimental to our health.
I have a friend who has been Paleo for a few years now and has pointed me to some great blogs and websites with recipes and advice.
So what can and can't we eat?
CAN:
- Grass-produced meats
- Fish/seafood
- Fresh fruits and veggies
- Eggs
- Nuts and seeds
- Healthful oils (Olive, walnut, flaxseed, macadamia, avocado, coconut)
CAN'T:
Considering that Maddie is allergic to wheat and dairy, I think we will do well. I will randomly keep you updated on our progress. ~S
Websites to check out if curious:
http://thepaleodiet.com/about-the-paleo-diet/
http://www.marksdailyapple.com/#axzz2JDYhhCxX
http://paleomg.com/
http://everydaypaleo.com/
http://paleopot.com/
http://www.chowstalker.com/
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Christmas Wrap-Up
Christmas was okay this year. Mainly because Matt & I picked up so many extra hours (both worked Christmas Eve and Christmas).
We still managed to do our usual holiday activities: Fantasy Trail, Nativity display in Clackamas with the Marsh Family, PIR Lights & Storybook Lane at Alpenrose Dairy. My parents were here and it was fun to see them open their presents as well. I managed to do most of my shopping online and within my budget. Hurray!
Here are some pics (mainly for my record)...
We still managed to do our usual holiday activities: Fantasy Trail, Nativity display in Clackamas with the Marsh Family, PIR Lights & Storybook Lane at Alpenrose Dairy. My parents were here and it was fun to see them open their presents as well. I managed to do most of my shopping online and within my budget. Hurray!
Here are some pics (mainly for my record)...
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| Opening stockings Christmas morning |
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| And the stocking were hung with care... |
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| We left out cookies, oranges and carrots for the reindeer |
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| Christmas morning |
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| Buddy the Elf's last day with us |
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| With the Gold kids at Storybook Lane |
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| Two trees and a wreath from our fundraiser tree farm :) Our first year with a tree in our room. |
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| We made a gingerbread house too :) |
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| Matt helped with lights this year. Turned out great! |
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| Downstairs tree. |
January Wrap-Up
The last two weeks have been fun. Work has been light and so I have been spending a ton of time with the kids. Matt and I have also been on many dates thanks to some gift cards (movies, comedy club).
This last week we went to Mt. Hood to sled. It was so much fun. I went snow shoeing for the first time and am addicted. What great exercise! I think Matt and I will try to do it more often. Being in Mt. Hood made us want to move closer to snow. We even looked at some properties in the area for fun.
I am pretty proud of myself too. It was 14 degrees on the mountain and all I had on was a tank-top, cardigan, hat and gloves. We tried to find me a winter coat on the way with no success. I am glad Matt bought me some Danner boots a few months back.
Considering that we lived in Utah for 23 years, it is hard NOT to be around snow :(. I love everything about it: driving in it, the brightness, the cold, the crunching sound as you walk on it and watching my kids sled like I used to when I was little.
We sold our kids' outdoor playhouse as well. We decided after much thought to do something fun with the money instead of saving it or putting it in the donation fund for my procedure. The last six months with Matt on graves was hell and we wanted to celebrate him being done, so we got a hotel while at Mt. Hood.
While we were there, we went to eat at a pizza place called Ratskellar. I was so excited! I ate at Ratskellar when I was a kid (in Utah) all the time with my family before it closed down. I have never seen one since! So fun to eat there with my kids :). It was just as good as I remember.
We also went shooting (Matt, Ashlin & I) while the kids were in school. Ash and I (after shooting) went exploring in the woods and had fun taking pics.
Here are some pics. ~S
This last week we went to Mt. Hood to sled. It was so much fun. I went snow shoeing for the first time and am addicted. What great exercise! I think Matt and I will try to do it more often. Being in Mt. Hood made us want to move closer to snow. We even looked at some properties in the area for fun.
I am pretty proud of myself too. It was 14 degrees on the mountain and all I had on was a tank-top, cardigan, hat and gloves. We tried to find me a winter coat on the way with no success. I am glad Matt bought me some Danner boots a few months back.
Considering that we lived in Utah for 23 years, it is hard NOT to be around snow :(. I love everything about it: driving in it, the brightness, the cold, the crunching sound as you walk on it and watching my kids sled like I used to when I was little.
We sold our kids' outdoor playhouse as well. We decided after much thought to do something fun with the money instead of saving it or putting it in the donation fund for my procedure. The last six months with Matt on graves was hell and we wanted to celebrate him being done, so we got a hotel while at Mt. Hood.
While we were there, we went to eat at a pizza place called Ratskellar. I was so excited! I ate at Ratskellar when I was a kid (in Utah) all the time with my family before it closed down. I have never seen one since! So fun to eat there with my kids :). It was just as good as I remember.
We also went shooting (Matt, Ashlin & I) while the kids were in school. Ash and I (after shooting) went exploring in the woods and had fun taking pics.
Here are some pics. ~S
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| Dinner at Zig Zag Inn |
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| Mt. Hood Sledding (Jaiden) |
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| Matt snow shoeing |
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| We made Ashlin a bed with two leather chairs at the hotel for fun :) |
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| Ratskeller Pizza! |
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| Resort at the Mountain (Matt & Jaiden) |
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| Shooting in the Mountains |
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| Ashlin's pic. Pretty good. |
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| Madeleine (she is getting so big!) |
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| Ashlin |
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| Me & Ash |
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Resolutions
I am not one for Resolutions, but I figured I would throw some out there.
For 2013 I Want To:
Laugh More
Appreciate the Small Things
Go on More Dates
More Nights at the Dinner Table (Graveyards prevented this)
~S
For 2013 I Want To:
Laugh More
Appreciate the Small Things
Go on More Dates
More Nights at the Dinner Table (Graveyards prevented this)
~S
A New Year
All of our fundraisers are done.
I am waiting on the Scentsy and Craft Boutique funds to come in (around $200 total) and my brother has promised a donation as well. That should bring us up to around $5,650.
We are getting so close to 7k!
Since the doctor requires the money for the Stem Cell procedure up front, we will make the first appointment when we reach 7k. At that point, all we will have to worry about is travel expenses.
In the Spring, we have two more fundraisers planned: A plant sale & silent auction thanks to two of my very good friends :)
My husband is also thinking of doing one in the next few months.
I am nervous about the actual procedure. Will it work? How much pain will it cause? What will my recovery be like and so forth. But, I have faith that this is the right direction.
At the end of the month, I am getting a biopsy for skin cancer (Vulvar Cancer). Because I have not responded to the conventional (and only) treatment, too much scar tissue has built up and cancer is a concern. Pray it will be negative as a positive result will delay the Stem Cell procedure.
Thanks for listening. Happy New Year. ~S
I am waiting on the Scentsy and Craft Boutique funds to come in (around $200 total) and my brother has promised a donation as well. That should bring us up to around $5,650.
We are getting so close to 7k!
Since the doctor requires the money for the Stem Cell procedure up front, we will make the first appointment when we reach 7k. At that point, all we will have to worry about is travel expenses.
In the Spring, we have two more fundraisers planned: A plant sale & silent auction thanks to two of my very good friends :)
My husband is also thinking of doing one in the next few months.
I am nervous about the actual procedure. Will it work? How much pain will it cause? What will my recovery be like and so forth. But, I have faith that this is the right direction.
At the end of the month, I am getting a biopsy for skin cancer (Vulvar Cancer). Because I have not responded to the conventional (and only) treatment, too much scar tissue has built up and cancer is a concern. Pray it will be negative as a positive result will delay the Stem Cell procedure.
Thanks for listening. Happy New Year. ~S
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